Tag: Fill Me In

I AM… resilient.

I WANT… a Wii, (“…right now” – in Janina San Miguel’s tone).

I HAVE… acrylic nails.

I WISH… I can start a business.

I HATE… pathological liars.

I FEAR… losing my children’s love and respect.

I SEARCH… for recipes, parenting tips, home improvement tips, furniture styles, fashion.

I WONDER… when we can be debt-free.

I REGRET… being friendly to almost anyone.

I LOVE… to be distinct. It makes me feel comfortable.

I ALWAYS… dress up.

I AM NOT… stupid and neither gloating!

I DANCE… when I hear, “Mama-se, mama-sa, ma-ma-coo-sa”

from Michael Jackson’s old hit “Wanna Be Starting Something”.

I SING… songs of worship and praises.

I CRY… when I remember Jesus’ passion and death.

I WRITE… on my journal (diary) and on my blogsite.

I WON… in a duet contest a long time ago

(with my dad when we sang “When I Fall In Love” when I was in 4th year high school).

I AM CONFUSED… when some people say they love you and yet they hurt you most.

I NEED… a spa/massage.

I SHOULD… read a new book. Suggestions are most welcome.

THE LAST THOUGHT YOU GO TO SLEEP WITH IS… how great is God’s love and grace.

They calm my raging seas.

Next to tag is Gem, Irmee, Cata, Mia

Simply Red

I was tagged by LitCoo who was tagged by Cata and was tagged by Mee and the list goes on...

(By the way, this is an overdue tag. It took me a long while to publish this post because I couldn't dig through my files for a "red" photo. But I remember of a handful of red shots because red is a favorite colour of mine. Inatake lang ako ng katam...katamaran!)

I was able to buy a red styletto shoes yesterday from Joanne Mercer for a bargain so I had a reason to wear today for work this red silky skinny long sleeves - something I bought from United Colors Of Benetton in Rome. I had to put a stress on UCB cause we don't have it in Sydney.

I'd like to tag April, Carla, and Leng.

The Rules:

1. Post your photo wearing red, may it be a red top, bottom, the least would be red accessories if you hate wearing red. If you can’t find one, you still have an option. Either post your Significant Other’s photo or your child’s photo, if you have one. Of course, they should be wearing red.

2. Let us know the reason why you were wearing red that particular day. Was it your birthday? Is red your fave color or was it the shirt that you first saw in your closet that day?

3. Tag 3 people close to your heart. By the way, they have to be in your blogroll. No cheating heart please.

Obsessed to be the best...

PARENT for my own children alone... that is!

Nine years ago, I was obsessed planning our wedding. (Thanks to http://www.weddingsatwork.com/! I still remember its early days when the number of members subscribed was just down to a hundred something I think, or even less!).

When I became a wife, as we don't have the privilege of having helpers unlike in the Philippines, I became obsessed on cooking, baking, cleaning up toilets and kitchen and training dear hubby to be domesticated. (Hahaha! Successful naman so far).

When I first got pregnant, I became obsessed on nurturing my then unborn Wiji. I was eating 8-10 apples a day. (Well, it was the only food my stomach could take). No salt on my fries please and I hated oily, processed food. Listened to only classical music at home and in the car. Said adieu to pop radio station. Dear hubby and I read pregnancy books and was full of conviction that I would give birth the natural way. And we were able to achieve that by reading the Bradley Method book I have ordered from US. (I covered it with plastic cover and used it again for the second son, Yoyon.)

So now that I am a parent, my goal is to be the best mother to my sons. And just like my previous obsessions, I only have one take at this. NO repeats! One of my greatest fear is to fail them. One day they will have a mind of their own and I hope they will perceive me as the best mum they can ever have in this world.

I was reading Bo Sanchez's journal the other day and that of Jim Paredes'. And they made me reflect again and revisit the last six years of my parenting stint. While I can say that I have done my best, I believe there are still a lot of areas in me as a mother that needs a little tweaking.

So I will set a few goals before I hit 40. Whoah! That's another decade from now but we all know that 10 years can go by in a flash. And before I knew it, "Life has just begun" for me again.

1. YES. As inspired by Bo, I will always say YES when my children ask me to read them a story. Kasehodang, pati right vocal cord ko eh ma-paralyse. Oh yes, the left vocals have been damaged for a year now. Depressing but I just pray for a miracle.

But when it comes to requests such as wrestling, transforming Bumblebee and Optimus Prime, or sit on the couch and play PS... I think my sons will understand if I will have to beg off. Those are dear hubby's share to my YES.

2. SLOW DOWN. I said before if I hit an annual gross of 6 digit, then I'm good to quit. That was before petrol prices hit $1 per litre. Unfortunately, now's not the time to quit. Instead, I will slow down and minimize working late and going home late, and will have the discipline to be home earlier for my kids. Long hours will be limited to only twice (tops!) a week. As they say, quantity time with kids is quality time. Gotta hang out with them as much as I could.

3. GETTING REALLY FIT. Even if I'm on my ideal weight right now, I have to start to really look after my health. I can't wait to be 40 or 50 before I become conscious of what I eat and drink. With dear hubby's cholesterol level shooting up, I have to scratch the weekly menu and find healthier alternatives. The after dinner walks and jogs around the neighbourhood with dear hubby must be on a regular basis too. Come to think of it, it serves as a good bonding time for us also. We both need to be strong and healthy so we can enjoy a lot of years being together and bringing happiness and hopefully inspiration to our childrens' lives.

4. PRAY MORE. Need I say more? To be honest, I never appreciated the power of prayer until I hit 30. I never understood the power of His grace that suffices all our needs, that makes us whole, renewed and deserving of His love. And I believe with a lot of prayers, I can be stronger, physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually so I can achieve these goals without too much strife.

So if you notice me going against these goals (which probably my dear hubby would do with regards to #2), please pull me back to this posting so I can rearrange my world again.

The Throb...

Last night's dinner conversation with my little boys were quite interesting. As usual, Yoyon would tell tales of how his day was at the childcare. If I asked him how his day went, he would enthusiastically reply, "Good! I play wid mah frend". If I asked what he ate, he'd say "I ate apple, bread, mac-roni... Daz all!". That's my 2 year old boy.

Now, my almost 6 year old son, had a different story of how his day was at school.

Wiji : You know mum, my friend Jarrod and Brooke (their classmate) kissed! I saw it! Some girls and some boys saw it too!
Me : (in shock!) Huh? Ahm, hmmm, how did they kiss? Was it on the cheek.
Wiji : Brooke just went close to his face and they kissed on the lips!
Me : (in shock again) Huh? Ahm, ahm, forget about it and don't do it to other girls! Okay? (My dear hubby did not approve of my advice. But I can't think of any at that moment.)

The other day he was telling me that Jamie has a girlfriend in class and her name is Jessica. So I asked, "What about you?". He said, "I don't have one. I don't like to have one." Haay, buti naman!

His stories are giving my head a throb. I just don't know how to respond sometimes.

Gone are the days that he'd tell me that he played in the sandpit, or did a lot of drawing, or listened to a nice story. I'm sure it's going to get a lot more interesting in the days ahead.

I saw this book before. I can't remember which bookstore. But it was giving tips on what answers you can offer for different age groups when they start asking "big" and intimate questions. I think I need to find that book...

The Kindie Heart Throb

My eldest who is turning six in a couple of months time, is a favorite in the Out-Of-School-Hours Care within their school. This young blonde lady (a carer) is smittened by his 'big eyes', apparently.

When the carer met my sister, she said she is looking forward to meeting the Parents of Wiji and all praises for his well-behaved character.

When she met dear hubby , she expressed "delight" in finally seeing where those cute genes came from. (At mukhang delighted din ang dear hubby with all the flattery!!!).

When we met... WE HAVEN'T. LOL! I'm sure she'd say it didn't come from hubby - but from ME!!! (I know someone will strongly raise an objection. Sige na nga! Sa yo na galing! After all, looking back over the last 13 years, certified matrona killer ka naman talaga! LOL!)

A family friend's daughter, Dani, was even telling her mum this story that this carer blurted out these words to my son, "Oh, you're so cute. I want to take you home". Teka, teka! Iba na ang dating! Of course I get it that it was said in jest cause she probably really finds my son adorable! Flattered I am. At the same time worried that he might be following the footsteps of his dad's matronish killing looks! Ha ha ha!

Some inspirational words I got this morning...

Sunrise marks God's message of PEACE, LOVE, and HOPE... While sunset stands for His GRACE. May you always have the best in between these two beautiful moments. Good morning! PS. That was the silhouette shot taken by dear hubby along the shores of beautiful Palawan, Philippines back in March 2004.

Waking up to Maroon 5

On my way to work, I heard this song, "Wake Up Call" by Maroon5 which reminds me of this whorrendous matrimonial bed incident as posted a few weeks ago. I still cringe in ... eeeewww! .

Anyway, I almost forgot that in a month's time, I will be seeing their concert at the Acer Arena, Sydney Olympic Park with my good girlfriend. (As in GOOD, walang kiyaw kiyaw! Don't ask me what that lingo is, I got it from my big Ate.)

I love Adam - his voice is unique even if some of his songs are quite weird just like this Wake Up Call... Haaay! Wake up na talaga!

Living in the Best City

That's coming from this Sydney is world's best city - again.

Well, if not for the housing prices soaring high, interest rates upto our neck, our "daily grind" on M2 (Motorway 2) that debits $4.40 from our E-Tag each way (but I would not exchange it for public transportation that would rather take a toll on my health because I will suffer a significant level of anxiety waiting and dealing with breakdowns and delays), and last but not the least - the limited shopping hours (makes me want to run for public office and introduce extended retail hours), I can agree in a heartbeat that it's the best city to live in.

***********************************************************************************

Through the nine years I have lived here, I can say that it took a few years before a part of me has been "Australianized" and before I have learned to appreciate the limitations of this city. Actually, I may have been limiting myself that's why it took longer for me to really settle here emotionally.

Hubby was the only big anchor (my sole family) that kept me here during those times. And he was great, that even drifting on sometimes lonely shores of this continent, the experience wasn't too bad cause I was never alone. Now that we have two boys, I take pride that people say it's the best city for them. For me it's the best because this is where me and my own beautiful family live. Hehehe! (Ang kumontra, panget! Hahaha!)

My Student of the Week

Had I not gave in to Wiji, he wouldn't know the surprise awaiting him last Friday in school.

Both boys have been fighting cough and colds since late last week. So last Friday, because it had turned to incessant cough for Wiji (colds triggers his asthma), I was trying to persuade him not to attend school for the day. But he insisted. Baligtad ano? Sana ganito lagi! (((LOL)))!

When he got back in the afternoon, he rang me at work and proudly told me that he was chosen to be the kindergarten's Student Of The Week. I remember I was asking him a few days before that - on how one can be on that list - when I saw it in last week's newsletter from the school.

So for this week, his name was on the newsletter and his big photo displayed on the bulletin board. Last night, he announced that he will be the class' captain for next week. In his own words, he describes it as being the leader, the one walking in front of the class wherever they go!

Go Wiji! Go! Go! Go!

What's Lunch for Today? (Pa-Order Oh Waiter)

Eating shouldn't be a frustration - not when you know what to eat and where to get what you want to eat!

During the week, everytime I haven't gotten any "baon" (packed big lunch - at Luis' school there's little lunch which is synonymous to our recess), I often spend a lot of time, thinking what I want to get especially when you don't have much choices around here (that includes "rice" together with the typical Pinoy ulam).

When I heard this song from Parokya ni Edgar, I just kept laughing especially when he sang at the end, "Gutom lang talaga ako..". I can easily throw a fit when I'm starving!

Whatever It Takes...

A few days ago, hubby downloaded new songs for my Ipod. This morning I listened to all the songs he recently added. And this was one of those : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iawro7IfoCM

It's the first time I heard this song but it felt so familiar already... Couldn't help feeling a bit emotional on my way to work. It was as if the lyrics evolved - somewhere - from our past ...

(Unfortunately I cannot embed the video from YouTube. Anyone knows how to hack it?)

Anyway, here's the lyrics...

Whatever It Takes Lyrics by Lifehouse

A strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn't even know
Now there's a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes

She said "If we're gonna make this work
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts
Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"
She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
And give me a break
I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better

But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I'd be lost without you and never find myself
Let's hold onto each other above everything else
Start over, start over

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
and believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes

Loved Up

This was our post Valentine lunch at Crown Plaza Hotel right after attending HillSong Church service. (Oh, I haven't told you about us regularly attending the service for more than 3 months now... That will be blogged later on if I remember...)

This was dear hubby's gift as stated as a courtesy invite in the Valentine's card he gave me of which the excerpt says, "my hope for today and everyday, is that you'll know and feel with all your mind and heart that I love you without doubt and hesitation... I love you with all that I am and with all that I can give..."

I heart you too my Babes. I used to feel your love was just too much. But in hindsight, it was really what I loved most about you! "For whatever has been and whenever the future seems uncertain, just always remember that I was not just walking behind you, but I was and will always walk through life beside you." ... So it won't be too hard for you to find me ...

To end this entry let me just share the panacotta I had for dessert. It was just very well presented!

Where did 2007 go?

I have abandoned this space for quite a while again. It's now 2008 and I can vaguely explain how 2007 went for me. But I can vividly remember how it felt. The memories of the last year, to put it simply, ... were bittersweet!

The bitter part of it still stings but it doesn't cut like a knife anymore for I know I am THE better person while some people are just brought up to be fatal errors on this earth. (It was unfortunate of me to have come across such a screwed character. But I am thankful that the encounter wasn't that long.)

So as the last month of 2007 approached I started basking in the glory of the sun. I am rejuvenated, refreshed, renewed. Awakened from this deep stupor by the sweet caring words from dear husband.

In 2007, we have endured seven years of marriage and he picked the winning Christmas card last December. For it says,

"The first time I saw you, I somehow knew you'd be important in my life.
In my eyes, you were beautiful in so many ways.
There was no doubt that I wanted to spend forever with you.

And when we got married, things were every bit as good as I'd hoped.
I didnt' want anything to change.
But... life is full of changes.
Not everyday can be paradise.

Together we've faced reality, the day to day "bumps in the road" that test every couple's patience.
I've seen you in many challenging situations.
And the miracle is...
you're even more beauitful than I thought possible.

Not only you are the woman of my dreams
but you're also my best friend.
And as time passes by
I fall more deeply in love with you."

That surely melted my heart and now I feel so loved up!

And I may have been yakking to my TRUEST of friends how life can be unfair sometimes. I now know that with a little faith, He will make me see the beauty that surrounds every desperate moment. Now I choose to live out of the shadows and walk into the light. And I will stay there as long as I breathe - together with my family - the love of my life.

Nice Read... All the best for 2008

Lefthanded Soldiers by Gary Eby


Lefthanded Soldiers is dedicated to all of those who have been wounded in life ... whether physically, emotionally, spiritually, or financially and yet, against all odds, have risen from the devastation to become a champion!


There are few things in life that move me like seeing someone overcome adversity. I believe that there are great men and women from all walks of life, who, because of some "event" or series of events, have pretty much given up. Somewhere between brokenness and bitterness many have laid down their proverbial swords and surrendered. They've been wounded. Lefthanded Soldiers teaches us that when we are wounded … when our "right arms" have been hurt … that we can become Lefthanded Soldiers rather than allowing our circumstances to condemn us to a life of "what-ifs."


How many great leaders are no longer leading? What will our society suffer because the leadership we need is somewhere hurting rather than rallying the troops? What great sickness is raging because the doctors and nurses who can make a difference are in need of healing themselves? How many great sermons will not be preached because an overworked and underpaid Pastor had a "humpty-dumpty" fall and is allowing condemnation to keep him out of service? Great public servants, teachers, volunteers, entrepreneurs, and politicians, all over the world are waiting ... waiting for someone to care enough to put their arms around them and say ... "Let's get back into the battle of life again! We need you!"


I believe that great leaders can inspire the "wounded warriors" among us that they can "engage" in life again and they can be winners!


In the real world … most of the time ... it's the size of your mess that determines the size of your message. It may not be pleasant to hear, but, the size of your testimony is due, in large part, to the size of your test.
Where would Abe Lincoln have been without the Civil War? Where would John Kennedy have been without the Cuban Missile Crisis? David needed Goliath to become King. You cannot not wear a victor's crown without having fought a few battles! You can't sing before you talk. You can't run before you walk.
You can't have a message until you´ve had a mess … and you can't have a testimony until you've had a test! Let's look at these lyrics to a song that I wrote.


"The victor's crown only goes to those who've been in war.
Eagles can't stay in their nest if they want to soar.
Sitting on the side lines you'll never be your best.
You can't have a testimony `till you've had a test."


"God won't send thirsty people to an empty well.
Heavens cup sure is sweeter once you've tasted hell.
There's no wine until the grape has gone through the press.
You can't have a testimony `till you've had a test."


Out of this understanding "Lefthanded Soldiers" was born. I want to teach you ... to teach others that "Change is a door that can only be opened from the inside!"


The willingness to change can be inspired by others but change itself is a personal choice. It is "Choice" not "Chance" that determines your destiny.


Lefthanded Soldiers is a call for the wounded to "get back into the battle of life!"


Lefthanded Soldiers is a call for leaders to build an army of renewed, revived warriors. Let's teach them that they can make a decision to "engage" in life again. Let's teach them that they can make a difference in the world. They can be "Lefthanded Soldiers!"


--Gary Eby


"It's the action, not the fruit of the action that's important.
You have to do the right thing. It may not be in your power, may not be in your time, that there'll be any fruit; But that does not mean you stop doing the right thing. You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no results." Mahatma Gandhi


Be a 'Lefthanded Soldier' and make a difference in the world.

Wishing you a prosperous 2008.

We've moved...

Finally, we're into the new home we started dreaming about almost 2 years ago and started building in January this year.

November 19 was the day we moved in this new family home. I'm still halfway done with unpacking. And it might take me years to furnish this 5 bedroom house with a study room and theatre room downstairs. Ayayayay!

Pintong Mahiwaga

''Isang pintong mahiwaga di bubukas na kusa
Si Hesus ang doo'y tumutuktok, naghihintay ng sagot
Sumagot ka na ba sa Kanya? O ayaw mong paabala?
Ang buhay mo ay laging gugulo kung wala si Kristo sa iyo.

Pag-isipan, o anong ligaya ang iyong malalasap doon sa kaluwalhatian
Puso mo'y buksan at si Kristo'y anyayahan, kaligtasa'y tunay na makakamtan. ''

This is one of my favourite Filipino Christian songs since I was young. My uncle's choir always sings this during the mass. When Nanay Nena died, they sang it again. I tried to record their rendition on my mobile phone Nokia N91 but two weeks ago - this model has given up on me! Grrr! Now I'm in dire search for the mp3. Can you direct me where to?

A Song from Miss Saigon that Touched HOME...

Yesterday Louie and I (together with Ate), watched Miss Saigon at the Lyric Theatre. Leo Valdez was really a standout.

Anyway, it was during the act when Kim was holding 3 year old Tam as she sang I'd Give My Life for You , that made me cry heavily. Listening to these two verses struck home - home is where my two sons are ...

"I've tasted love beyond all fear
And you should know it's LOVE that brought you here
And in one perfect night when the stars burned like new,
I knew what I must do

I'll give you a million things I'll never own
I'll give you a world to conquer when you're grown
You will be who you want to be
You, can choose whatever heaven grants
As long as you can have your chance
I swear i'll give my life for you"

And I think even just typing this blog entry has started to swell up my eyes again. I must end it here.

On my own in Manila...

It felt weird going back to Manila on my own. This is the place where I met Louie, where we finished college together, where we had our barkada, and where we fell in love most importantly.

We had so much history together that my heart ached whenever I chowed down those sizzling bulalo, balot, crispy pata, Andok's manok, Chicken Joy, etc. So I just drowned myself with a lot dalandan juice, mango shake, tamarind juice, San Mig Light just to forget the pain of being ocean's apart from my hubby and our two boys. And to kill time - I went to the salon, checked out Trinoma, Megamall, GB3, The Block, Serendra, Greenhills, Divi 168, Mall of Asia. But I just couldn't take going for a spa and lay in my own naked body without my hubby around (READ: I ran out of time!!!) .

That was a week long. And had he not persuaded me to come back home as soon as possible, I would have gotten stuck there. I'm glad he did!

Seriously babes, it was really NOT fun NOT having you with me all throughout my stay. Your humour and good company was sorely missed. (It was really difficult keeping together my passports, boarding pass, baggage claim number, e-ticket. And I had to take a deep breath everytime I would dare grab my luggage from the carousel. Thank God, there are still good souls out there who are ready to help a klutz lady like me.)

The good side of it, at least I would know where to take you the next time we fly to Manila with our boys. So get ready!

My own granny...

She passed away peacefully last Sept 27. Although my mom wasn't adamant at all that I fly back to Manila for the funeral, I thought she was the Lola who looked after me when I was young and whenever mom was at work so it's just right to "visit" her one last time.

Nanay Nena took care of me just how my mom looked after her own grandchildren, Luis and Leon.

I remember my Nanay Nena will take me to church, to the "palengke" when I was in kindie. When she had her first stroke, I was already 15 years old. In reverse, I was the one who would take her to the hospital for her therapy and I remember arranging her medicines in a rack of bottles of different coloured lids, labelling them appropriately.

I didn't cry much when she was laid to rest cause I know she is in a much better place now.

To my granny, see you when I see you :)

Welcoming Xtine down under...

Late last month, we had the pleasure to meet in person someone I have known back from the good old w@w - n@w days. Christine who migrated to NZ several years ago paid the OZ based n@wies a visit.

Thanks to Carla@Jon for opening their home to host the Sunday lunch.

See you again friend! Really had a great time chatting with you and Simon and Bea. All the best with the new work!

Broken Promises... no more!

I am left with no words to explain why I haven't been visible in the blog world yet again.

I just came back a few days ago from a week long hiatus in Manila. (Yes Xtine I will try to update this site soon. No more broken promises cause I ain't promising anything. Hehehehe!)

Abangan na lang...

What's currently playing in my new Nano IPod?

O Hesus, Hilumin Mo
(By Bukas Palad Ministry)

KORO:
O Hesus, hilumin Mo
Aking sugatang puso
Nang aking mahango
Kapwa kong kasimbigo

Hapis at pait Iyong patamisin
At hagkan ang sakit
Nang magningas ang rikit (KORO)

Aking sugatang diwa't katawan
Ay gawing daan
Ng 'Yong kaligtasan (KORO)



Hinihiling nitong pulutin ni Hesus ang pira-piraso ng basag-basag na buhay, at muling buuin. Sapagkat Siyang sinugatan at binasag sa krus ang Siyang pinakamainam at pinakamabisang lunas at ligaya ng pusong sugatan at basag din. Sa gayong paraan, nakamtan ang lakas at tapang upang humayo at magdala ng pag-ibig at paghilom sa kapwa sugatan.

Back Online... ( I hope!)

I've detached myself from the virtual world for the last two months. What a shame, I must admit!

Hopefully I can upload all ou Europe pics in my multiply site. I've been procrastinating. But if you're my friendster buddy then most probably you've seen most of it already!

Let me get my act together and maybe (just maybe!) in the next couple of days I'll be back with more stories and pictures to tell!

M

My 30th birthday

I never knew that I was gonna be in for the biggest surprise of my life. Give me time and maybe I will tell you all about it ...



For now, let the pictures speak of the blast we had in Europe.

More pics when we arrive in Sydney in a couple of days time.

Signing off from Heathrow Airport, London...